Perhaps the frightening reason for the messes I find myself in, is that my faith is really set on the shifting sands that are feelings.
It’s ironic how I wish I chose a college more in line with God’s will rather than my own desires, but then thinking ahead of time at the thought of transferring, I feel a strong “no” come to mind.
I really should listen more and act wisely. Even yesterday my mom told me not to go out with friends because I had a fever. Common sense should have won, but I wanted to go anyways. Well, I came home with chills and my friend got into a car accident along the way.
Same deal with college. Taking out so much in debt for the sake of this education, with what the Bible speaks about money and life in general, seems unwise idiotic. Only time will tell of what consequences I face soon.
Lord, but I must trust in your sovereign will for me. And I need to submit. Everything.
On drifting away and coming back:
“‘God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.’ Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.” James 4:6-8
On how I looked at choosing a college and how I ought to have looked:
“Come now, you who say, ‘Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit’—yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, ‘If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.’” James 4:13-15
I am not where I should be. I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t want to be a burden. I don’t want to use Jesus or anyone else only when I need help, because that’s definitely what I feel is happening. Anyhow, meh.
So here You’re telling me, “Do not conform to this world.” And instead, I’m over here screaming “I wanna conform to this world.”
Ok flesh, you can die now.
This is the last day of high school for me, and my emotions are all over the place.
“Daily Bread”, Not “Lifetime Supply.”
When God gives me instructions and I’m obedient to what I’m already given, He gives me more instruction.
I confess that I often want the whole roadmap to life before I listen to what He wants from me today.
#collegecollegecollegecollegecollegecollegecollegecollegelife
(Source: jacobsaulportillo)
We need to start living according to God’s value system, rather than give our lives to the causes the world deems important.
(Source: -dejalenae-)
I see so many people, non-Christian or Christian, who simply have better hearts than I. I know I shouldn’t compare myself to anyone, but frankly I don’t do what I say, and see other people being much more selfless, courageous, and loving. Just a thought.
The trouble is where faith comes into play. God, be my everything as I choose a college.
Tell me, if I take a step and attend a prestigious university that will put all our finances in a squeeze during and after college, am I right to have faith that God will provide, whether it be spiritually, mentally, or financially, knowing what I may reap from it?
Or will the rationality of the human mind say “No. You’re crazy. Go to a cheaper school, and give up that opportunity”. Will I have the faith to say yes to this route? Even now as I don’t have actual options that are viable for this, still I am forced to ask.
Am I being selfish? Am I being mindful of only my interests and what I want in an education? Everybody knows this isn’t easy; who likes thinking about the unpredictable nature of future and life. But the one thing I know I have that this world does not have is the peace of Christ. The stress I feel now will be overwhelmed as I realize in the grand scheme of things who takes care of me.
Can I be honest and say that Achan’s sin and his swift punishment is scary and confusing me?
Something I greatly detest in myself is my tendency to become overly passionate about something, to the point where I proudly attempt to snuff out and destroy any opposition to it. If I want something, I’ll defend it. And then what happens? A few hours, days, weeks from then, and my emotions will completely change, and I’ll likely become relaxed or bored with it.
Why I hate it now is because I’m about to decide on college, majors, careers, future debts.
My college decision has been narrowed down to Northeastern and Boston University, and I have spent a long time looking at reviews, stats, videos, etc. lol.
Northeastern seems to be winning with price and co-op.
thursday night bible study
Words are not empty; they are not powerless. Words do not evaporate. Prayers and petitions stack up before the Lord and create a big monument. Our words are heard by Him, and the more we pray for something, the larger the monument becomes until He can no longer see past it. Not to say that He would not do something about our prayers before the monument grew so large. Do not read over, misunderstand, or diminish the value of the proverb: “Death and life are in the power of the tongue” (Proverbs 18:21). Be careful about what you say. Be careful because you have the ability to spring forth life or spring forth death- and don’t be so deceived as to think that your words don’t mean anything: they do. Words are not empty; they are not powerless. Words do not evaporate. They ACT. We reap what we sow, and we reap more abundantly. Consult the Lord about everything. He is your constant Companion; He is your Comforter, Healer, Guide, and Refuge. Let Him be that in your life.
Also,
Quit trying to take control of your life; for who is wiser than his Creator? Ask yourself 3 questions every time you want to do it your way instead of His: 1) Does God love me? Yes, He does. 2) Does God want the best for me? Yes, He does. Only good things come from the Lord (James 1:17). 3) Is God smarter than me? Yes, He is. He created the heavens and the earth and all that is in it; in fact, He SPOKE them into existence. Words are so powerful, my friends. Stick close to the Father, and He will stick close to you.
